Honor my husband! . . .pffft WHATEVER!

WARNING!

If your easily offended this may not be the post for you to read. If you don't know me personally, you may conclude I am a misogynist chauvin. If you know me personally, you may conclude I am misogynist chauvin. . . Try to make it through the whole post, then let me know what you think.

The role of men is under attack in America. You would not have to search long to discover the theme of most "family" or domestic sitcoms feature a clever and condescending wife/girlfriend/children patiently dealing with a bumbling idiot of a husband/boyfriend/father through life's little challenges - wa wa waaaah! It has become ingrained as an attitude in our contemporary culture. The pendulum has swung from Mrs. Clever/Lucy to King of Queens/George Lopez, and neither extreme is accurate or a beneficial reinforcement of attitudes.

Time and time again, in books, TV shows, articles, movies, and in real life. . . brides choke, chafe, dismiss, cut out, or mock the part of the wedding vow which binds them to "honor and obey" their husband. I'm not saying the media is responsible for this. In fact, I am one who believes media and entertainment are markers or indicators of existing and growing social trends.

I kid you not, I have been to five civil ceremonies and three temple sealings where the officiator gave advise along the lines of "do what she wants and you'll have a good marriage." The officiator actually thinks he is smarter than the God he professes, knows better than the Scriptures he professes to believe in, he dismisses the covenants he professes that God established and the bride just took! Am I the only one who thinks this might be a problem?!

We laugh at the jokes, promote the stereotypes, encourage the affeminization of men, and suppress the healthy male roles. . . all while wondering at the consequences to society!

• 50% divorce to marriage rate (Mormons have higher than national average, so don't smirk)
• Increase in repeat divorces
• A Fatherless rate as high as 80% in some demographics
• 20% increase in single parent homes (83% of which are mother/children)
• Sharp drop in total marriages
• Unmarried women will soon surpass the number of married women
• Steady increase in unmarried couple households

My world view embraces the idea that family is eternal and divine. I also believe our Creator established a family order which naturally promotes stability and happiness. The roles of men and women in the family are part of that order. I'm not talking about division of labor, God never appointed women as the eternal housemaid and cook. I am talking about roles - women nurture, nourish children and affirm their man; men protect, provide, lead the family and love their wives. Some may bristle at this notion, but I believe honest observation bears this out.

I can pop a bottle in a newborn baby's mouth, keep it fed but most would agree I am unable to pop out the baby and I don't hold a candle to the mother baby bond and the nurturing that goes on. It is a role that women are uniquely endowed to fulfill. Likewise a woman has a unique power to affirm and empower her man. When a woman loves, encourages, respects, and affirms her man - he will move mountains to lay a straight path for her.

Men are uniquely suited to their roles; one of which is to lead. There is a crucial need in society for the strong male role model. We need real men! When the natural role of men is diminished, undercut, dismissed and mocked the subsequent crisis in leadership leads to these startling statistics . . .

• 85% of all children that exhibit behavioral disorders come from fatherless homes.
• 71% of all high school dropouts come from fatherless homes
• 75% of all adolescent patients in chemical abuse centers come from fatherless homes.
• 70% of juveniles in state operated institutions come from fatherless homes.
• 85% of all youths sitting in prisons grew up in fatherless homes.
• 80% of rapists motivated with displaced anger come from fatherless homes.
• 90% of all homeless and runaway children are from fatherless homes.

These statistics translate to mean that children from a fatherless home are:

• 20 times more likely to have behavioral disorders
• 9 times more likely to drop out of high school
• 10 times more likely to abuse chemical substances
• 9 times more likely to end up in state operated institutions
• 20 times more likely to end up in prison
• 10 times more likely to commit rape
• 32 times more likely to run away from home

It is time for society to respect and value the strong male role model. Ladies, it starts with YOU! It begins with a commitment to love, respect, honor and obey your husband. We'll talk about the hows in the next post and the man's part in the next one after that. Ok, let me have it . . . bring on the comments.